The title of this blog post is taken from a line in a Fernando Ortega song, Sing to Jesus, and really got me to thinking about the cross and what it continues to mean. The song is beautiful and describes the beauty and horror of Jesus hanging on the cross bearing our sins and every evil ever committed by man.
The creator of the universe who was the image of the invisible God came to earth as a weak baby. My daughter, Flannery is now 7 weeks old and very fallible and sinful. Very difficult thing to comprehend that the Lord of the universe was like my own daughter at one time and still God. Yet in order to pay the price of sin in the world, to reconcile everything to himself, in order to make peace, He came to die. We all know that we will die one day but few of us think about our lives as having that purpose, yet that was the purpose of that weak baby born in mud and a barn.
He became the Lord of our shame in the greatest mystery ever. When I think about all the wicked things I have done, all the pain that I have caused, all the destructive things I have done, I can’t help but feel shame in the presence of a holy God who demands and deserves nothing but perfection. It is only when I remember the cross, the mercy tree, that I feel a gladness that I think only a Christian who is a huge sinner can feel.
Shame is something that nowadays is reserved for counseling sessions and very little else. We try and not shame anyone lest they feel sequestered from “normal” people. We do wrong and commit all kinds of sin but think little of it until we are confronted with Jesus and the cross, a perfect man and God who deserved nothing but praise and honor bore our sins and shame in a way that we could not do. When the sacrifice on the cross becomes clear, we see that Jesus is Lord of our shame. He bore shame, all that could not be fulfilled through our good deeds, and everything that could condemn us was placed on Him.
The mystery of God’s love and grace is not easy to understand. It is not something that I have completely grasped even after 20 plus years of calling myself a Christian. I hope that I never grasp it completely but I am grateful for those late nights that a song and scripture makes you remember that Jesus is King and that my sins are washed away, and just a small glimmer of light peeks through the darkness of myself and lets me see who I am in Christ and what Christ has accomplished through the shameful cross.
I am writing this letter to you Jude as a memorial of God’s grace that everyone should see. I hope this letter doesn’t embarasse you later on in life or make you mad if you read this when you are older. I hope that the following things that I write will be very sweet to you and will give you hope when life really gets tough and hurts much more than any physical pain you could have.
It has been a little over six months since your accident and already, you are healing up very nicely. Your smile is back and the scar is starting to heal on your face. There is no effect from where you severed your ankle tendon and the gash on your belly will be a good story that you can make up when you get older.
When I first got the phone call from your aunt that I needed to come and get you quickly, I had never seen someone run through a glass door so I assumed that you were a little cut up and probably were going to have a headache. Not until I heard the ambulance sirens in the distance as I hung up the phone to drive over to where you were, did I start to think that this was a big deal. Little did I know that this single event would rival your birth in impact to me, your mama, and you.
At first, all I could see was the door you had run through in pieces. Giant shards of glass hung down from the old sliding door you had plowed through and tiny pieces of sharp glass lay on the ground with your blood coating their edges. You were covered up with a towel and were sitting quietly with your aunt holding you in her lap. As she removed the towel showing your cheek laid open, I almost threw up. I hadn’t expected that and upon seeing it, I felt a mixture of terror for you and a sick stomach from the blood. Your shoe was full of blood and I at first thought you had somehow cut your foot off. Thankfully that wasn’t the case.
The man who came to repair the door, told your aunt that he was surprised that you lived through it. He said that usually people get torn to ribbons and cut major arteries as they pass through the door. I am convinced that God knew every piece of glass that would cut you. If he knows the hairs on your blond head, then surely he knows the glass that cut you up.
When I think about how well you have adjusted to your accident both physically and emotionally, I marvel at the way that God has made each of us. In my opinion, you were the least likely person in our family to deal with something like this, but looking back, I don’t think anyone could have handled it quite like you did. Your sense of humor intact, you laughed so funny in the ER that you made everyone in the room laugh with you. The way that you didn’t cry a bit until they put the IV in your arm was truly the toughest thing that I have ever seen to date. The way you hobbled around like Tiny Tim on your walker was really funny after the initial shock of everything. You never really complained about IV’s, crummy hospital food, or the cast on your foot. I don’t think that anyone else could have handled this like you did.
I know that God has a plan for your life. I know that every piece of glass that could have cut you didn’t because God didn’t want it to. I hope that in the future, God’s plan will become more evident to you and us.
I hope that your scar on your face will be a reminder of God’s grace and mercy. When you call upon Jesus later in life, I hope you will remember how much he loves you and cares for you. I am so grateful that God has given you to us and am also thankful for his mercy in your life. I don’t know how long you will live in life. You will outlive me Lord-willing, and will have a family of your own and kids of your own. I hope that God will make you into a righteous man who loves Him and trusts him with all your heart. I hope that God will at a later point, help you to see your scar as a scar of mercy, hope, and grace.
I read this verse when you were born and fell in love with it like your mama and I did you,
“Now to him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you blameless before the presence of his glory with Great Joy, to the only God, our savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, dominion, and authority, before all time and now and forever, Amen.”
Jude 24-25
I love you Jude.
Papa
